The Biggest Christmas Gift Fails Of All Time

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Extreme Chores

Getting a great Christmas gift for friends or family is difficult, but that’s no excuse to get them something so bad that it makes this list! Imagine pulling out a large rectangular gift from under the Christmas tree, only to discover that it’s this terrible excuse of a video game. The point of playing games is to forget about mundane labor, not recreate it at a time of leisure. Not cool, Mom and Dad. Not cool at all.


Eye Pad

Ever since they came out, iPads are all the craze during the holiday season, year after year. While hundreds and hundreds of millions of units have been sold since Apple came out with its flagship tablet, some of our older relatives haven’t necessarily gotten the memo. The next time your grandmother asks you what you want for Christmas, make sure there are no two ways to understand it. To be fair to Grandma, it really does appear to be an honest mistake as iPads and eye pads sound exactly the same.

Christmas Carrots

In general, food products can make for very personalized and thoughtful gifts. Fresh fruits and vegetables, however, do not fall under this category. Things that do make good presents include: a bottle of single malt whiskey bought during a trip backpacking across Scotland, pork soda for a fan of the band Primus, or some sort of specialized treat. “Merry Christmas, here are some carrots for good eye health…” My goodness! Is that really the message we want to teach our kids on Christmas? Let them eat cookies.

Poor Taste

Imagine the sheer embarrassment at opening up this present in front of your family and friends. While the person who bought it likely believed he or she was being thoughtful, the person who received this gift couldn’t possibly be more mortified. A word to the wise: don’t buy beauty and hygiene products that bring attention to specific issues the person suffers from, especially if he or she is going to open the gift up in the presence of many people.

Instant Grow A Girlfriend!

This is a terrible gift on so many different levels. For one, it doesn’t look like she’ll ever be big enough to bring home to meet Mom, even if she does grow to six times her original size. It also insinuates that you’re so inept at getting a date that you might as well give up on trying to find a girl that walks and talks. But hey, at least she’ll be mostly composed of water, just like a real girlfriend.

Kleen Stride!

This is one of our favorites because we can all relate to getting something like this gift during the holidays. While this seems like a practical and innovative way to do things in theory, it’s clearly a terrible idea. As much as walking must be done differently in the snow, no one walks by dragging their feet forward. “Stop clowning around with old-fashioned debris removal tools!” Yeah, right. Because wearing broom bristles on your toes will make you look like less of a clown.

What A Waste Of $23

Gifting lottery tickets isn’t the most thoughtful idea for a Christmas present, even though they happen to be popular gifts. For one, the excitement only lasts as long as it takes you to realize you’re holding a losing ticket. And on the off chance that you do win, the person that bought you the ticket may well feel that they have been cheated out of winnings bought with their own hard-earned cash. Nicole went one step further and successfully ruined an already bad gift idea.

Creepy Coat Hanger

Whoever bought this is completely out of touch with reality. Really, who in their right mind would get a clothes hanger with doll arms and feet sticking out of them? It looks like someone took a doll from the kid’s bedroom and went to town on it with a table saw and a power drill, dismembering the poor thing. The worst part is that the hands appear to be reaching out from inside the wall as if groping around for help.

Secret Santa

The Secret Santa is a time-honored Christmas tradition that should be honored year after year. A group of people participating will put their names in a hat and choose at random another person to buy a gift for. These gifts are best when they’re silly little gag gifts that are personalized for each individual person. By selling shirts such as these, Tesco is threatening the survival of a holiday tradition that rejects the standardization of Christmas. And their T-shirt sucks.

Eye Watch

This appears to be a recurring problem with Apple’s entire “i” line of products. Each new line of gadgets produced by the company is prefixed with an “i,” whose which inconveniently sound like “eye.” This is the root of a surprising number of mix-ups, just like the eye pads that were featured earlier. If you want an Apple product for this holiday season and someone who isn’t the most tech-savvy person is asking you what you want, make sure you spell it out for them.

Discovering You Were Adopted

Many people have awkward and embarrassing stories about how they discovered they were adopted at a surprisingly old age. If you have a kid who was adopted, don’t wait until they’re in high school to let them know! Chance are they’ll figure it out eventually anyway, so it’s best to leave it in the open. Not only did these parents wait until the kid was older, but they also didn’t even have the courtesy to tell him or her straight up.

Gift Not Included

An overwhelming amount of toys come without batteries. So many, in fact, that the phrase “batteries not included” is ubiquitous in toy commercials. While obviously a prank that parodies this, it’s really not that funny. The very least they could have done is put in another battery! What can you do with one AA battery? Nearly everything that requires batteries needs at least two. Unless the idea is really an especially funny and witty one, just get the person something useful instead.

Grandma’s Cardigan

Clothes can be great gifts to give friends and family, but you must know the person’s tastes very well to make the gift work. Otherwise, the person is stuck with an article of clothing they don’t want. At the very least, if you do gift clothing, make sure they can exchange it for something else in the same store. With Grandma-made clothing it’s a completely different story: they think they know what you like to wear but don’t really. Worst of all, Grandma’s return policy involves tears.

Covered In Kitty Cats

This is actually a really cute gift idea to get younger kids, especially those who are enthusiastic about cats. But if that was who this gift was actually intended for, it would have never made it to this list. Apparently, Grandma figured that kittens would be perfect for her adorable little 24-year-old grandson to sleep under. Let’s hope he wasn’t planning on having a significant other sleeping over during the holidays, or it might raise several uncomfortable questions.

Care For A Spare Sweater?

Most of the gifts on this list were given to people who didn’t want what they got. The opposite is true for this guy because he really likes this shirt. The problem is he’s already got one. What’s crazy is that he chose that exact shirt to put on while he sat down with this family to open up presents. At the end of the day, at least he has a spare in case the one he’s wearing gets lost!

Antique TV

This gift would have been the talk of the town back when Grandma bought in in the 1950s, but today it’s basically useless. She got it so her grandson and his little friends can run off and play games on it. Too bad she obviously doesn’t know how this stuff works. Forget about hooking your X-Box to this screen with an HDMI cable, this TV is incompatible with any video game console built in the past 40 years. That being said, it could be sold to an antique dealer for a lot of money.

For Decorative Purposes Only

A well-wishing neighbor thought it would be a sweet treat to bring this family some cookies for the holidays. Imagine their shock when they realized that the whole family might be poisoned, but not by the cookies, by the plate! Actually, who would ever sell this? It seems like a lawsuit just waiting to happen. Out of all the materials to make dishes, why would you ever make it out of something poisonous, even if it’s only intended as a decoration?

Just What You Need

Although this guy looks happy to pose for an Instagram photo with this gift, it’s a pretty terrible present. Unless it’s produced by some luxury company, beauty and hygiene gifts are less desirable. This one is actually a bit insulting, even. If someone got me a present from the toilet paper aisle, I would take it as an insult. And really, how much money could this have cost? At least it’s useful when you’re on the road.

Heavy Duty Tape Dispenser

Unless you’re Milton from Office Space, this is the last gift you would ever want. Even Milton would find fault with it because he would insist on it coming in red. If you pick it up from under the tree, it must feel like the most misleading thing in the world. You feel the weight and assume it’s something awesome, only to discover it’s a glorified office supply. Why do tape dispensers even need to be heavy duty?

Ah… THOSE Gloves

Mothers-in-law are quite a handful to handle and this one is no exception. When you ask someone what they want for Christmas (which takes place in December, mind you!) and that person tells you they want gloves, the first thing that comes to mind shouldn’t be reusable latex gloves! Maybe there was a hidden message here… Hopefully, this is just an honest mistake and not a thinly veiled hint telling her son’s wife that she needs to keep the house cleaner.

Toe Warmers

Although this gift certainly fits with the weather during Christmas time, it’s actually quite a terrible gift. Out of all the things to get to keep your son warm, you chose something that can only be used once? Thick wool socks would also provide their kid with warm feet, but those can be worn over and over again. This might actually be an inspirational message for their son to not get cold feet, but then again, wouldn’t socks have been just as good?

Bacon Air Freshener

This might be one of the worst gifts on here. Bacon is a great smell to wake up to in the morning, not a great smell to drive to work with. In general, typical car air fresheners are gifts to avoid getting people you actually want to get something special for. If fresh air is the direction, maybe candles or incense are the way to go. If it really must be an air freshener, buy something a bit more fancy and high tech, perhaps.

Toilet Golf

Yes, they have actually made a mini golf for you to play while you’re on the toilet. No one needs this, but people have really purchased it for one another. Even if your dad is a huge fan of golf, beware of any gift that gives you a reason to stay on the toilet for a minute longer than is necessary. It isn’t recommended and can cause health problems. Besides that, the green mat looks like it will get nasty very fast.

Drinking From The Bowl

This guy seems to be taking his less-than-satisfying gift with a grain of salt, even though it’s pretty disappointing to open up a gift and discover that it’s a mug shaped like a toilet. Come to think of it, he’s probably taking his coffee with a grain of sugar. The coffee inside the mug, however, looks like someone finished business so serious in the bathroom that one flush wasn’t enough to take care of it. Maybe some people will find it funny in the beginning, but can you imagine drinking from that?

Softsoap

Once again, someone made a huge gifting no-no by wrapping up a regular old hygiene product. This isn’t a luxury product, but rather the cheapest thing on the market. Once again, hygiene products are less good as gifts. It appears that the person gifting this either took the first thing off the shelf or is possibly trying to insinuate that the person it is intended for smells bad.  Whatever the thinking was behind this gift, it’s better than nothing at all. Maybe.

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