30+ Dad Jokes That Are So Bad, They’re Great

This article appeared in Drivepedia and has been published here with permission.

These Dad Jokes Are Just Terrible!

Whether they make you laugh uncontrollably or cringe horribly, you all know that you secretly love when your silly dad cracks a terrible joke at the dinner table. So, here’s our round-up of some of the worst — or, in this case, best — dad jokes from Twitter. Now, excuse us as we go tell our dad some of these.

Shady Business

Would you say that in the case of this dad joke, the guy really put his foot in it? Because we totally would! That way, you get two silly jokes for the price of one!

Shady Business

There’s absolutely nothing shady about that deal, is there? After all, why would you settle for just one face-palm when you can be twice as exasperated by us? Sadly, it’s not super inspired, as it’s missing one crucial thing — our lightbulb moment!

Principals

Romantic courtship is no easy area to navigate. Just like maneuvering a minefield, the dating game has plenty of rules, pitfalls, and cautionary tales. One of the most basic cardinal laws is, of course, no messing about with married people.

Principals

Apparently, even when it comes to your own wife, the guidelines say, “No flirting.” This guy didn’t make the rules, he’s just following them to a tee. We’ll see how he feels when she puts down the law.

News to Us

We’re pretty sure that it’s common knowledge that the ultimate sign that you’ve had a night of truly deep and restorative sleep is waking up with those pillow crease lines on your face. It’s just indisputable evidence of your deep slumber.

News to Us

But, have you ever wanted to have those lines on your face without getting any proper rest — just for the aesthetics? Because that’s the only thing we can imagine corduroy pillows would be good for.

Vegetative State

We’re probably not the only cooks in this kitchen who like a good food pun — they’re just deliciously satisfying. This one, while horribly funny to us, might be especially disastrous.

Vegetative State

You see, in the crush of ingredients, this iceberg might spring a leek in your salad, and that would be a disaster of Titanic proportions. This just went out of the frying pan and straight into the fire, didn’t it?

Crocodile Tears

It’s a dad joke, so obviously, it makes us want to cringe. But, in the case of this tweet, we think it might also make us cry (and not from laughter). This croc dad joke was posted by Terri Irwin — the late Steve Irwin’s widow.

Crocodile Tears

Looks like in an attempt to be both mom and dad to their kids, Terri also took it upon herself to make cheesy and animal-related dad jokes. Honestly, this is incredibly wholesome, especially since she added a photo of their son.

USBee

Yes, we know this joke probably made you audibly groan. But, guess what? We don’t care due to two reasons. One, the whole point of a dad joke is to make everyone but the person who made the joke cringe and sigh.

USBee

And more importantly, two — because we think it’s absolutely adorable, and this makes us grin with joy every time we read it. This is exactly what a dad joke should be; a silly pun that works for a six or 60-year-old.

Watch Out

Some dad jokes are short and sweet, as they get their point across in less than 10 words. Others are somewhat more convoluted — instead of getting straight to the point, they take you on a journey toward the punchline.

Watch Out

This one certainly feels like quite a rollercoaster, but at the end of the day, it’s all about timing — and this joke sticks the landing (on the watch) as it nails its punchline by the end. Plus, who doesn’t love a bit of poetic justice in their humor?

Excel-lent!

This is going to get a little bit strange but stay with us. So, you know how your boss sort of becomes your emotionally distant parent at work? Well, can you imagine your grumpy boss making this joke?

Excel-lent!

(Boss, if you’re reading this, we promise we’re not talking about you! You’re more like the cool uncle!) Do you think if we make this joke we’re officially not getting our end-of-year bonus due to how cringe it is? Word.

To a Tee

Dad jokes aren’t just about lousy puns and silly punchlines. Sometimes, they’re just about dads being dads — sharing their quirky humor with their family in an attempt to make their kids groan and laugh.

To a Tee

Julie’s dad went far out to make this embarrassingly funny photo during a family trip. This is one memory that he’s sure to want to share with the grandkids one day.

Spidy-Sense

How do they say it goes with comedy? Something along the lines of setting up expectations and then subverting them is the key to a good joke, right? Anyway, we think this fantastically terrible joke nailed it.

Spidy-Sense

After this, we almost wish we could have that drink with our friendly neighborhood spider(man). We think we’ll still stay far away from any real creepy crawlies, no matter how good they are at designing.

Express Delivery

So, here’s the thing — we know that “which came first, the chicken or the egg” has been debated for decades as a deep philosophical question, but we honestly don’t get it. Thanks to our more recent understanding of science there’s only one answer.

Express Delivery

The egg came first. Yep, it’s that easy — the egg is the only place where the genetic mutation that created the first chicken could have occurred. That’s it. And we don’t care which one gets delivered first from Amazon!

The Horror!

We honestly think that this joke is pretty dang clever, even if we hate horror. Sure, we understand the enjoyment that can come from a jump in adrenaline — like going on a rollercoaster — but enjoying being frightened?

The Horror!

That’s just weird. Are we actually supposed to like getting nightmares from imaginary scenarios? We just feel like the real world is kind of scary enough as it is. Thankfully, here, it’s balanced with a silly joke.

Another One Bites the Dust

Job interviews are tricky. On the one hand, you want to be sincere, open, and honest in your answers so that the interviewer knows you can be trusted to shoulder the responsibilities of the new job.

Another One Bites the Dust

On the other hand, you need to show that you can be chill and funny to demonstrate your more friendly, social side so they know you’re a fun team player. We’re not sure, though, that you should use this specific joke to show all that…

Feeling Secure

Wouldn’t it be great if every office could be just like Dunder Mifflin? Let’s be honest — having Michael Scott as a boss is probably like non-stop dad jokes during work hours. Can you just imagine Dwight taking them at face value?

Feeling Secure

This joking security guard is bound to fit right in with Jim and Pam. Although, with the way his mind works, we’re not sure how secure the office would be… Thankfully, it’s all just paper, so who cares?

Full of Wind

As you probably know very well, a joke doesn’t need to be recited straight from the mouth of a certified father to be considered a top-notch dad joke. It must simply be groan-worthy and based on the silliest humor to be bestowed the honor.

Full of Wind

Ana’s fan-tastic job is the perfect example of this guiding principle. Don’t worry, Ana — just like you, we happily giggled at your musical joke (and then proceeded to quickly unfollow you on Twitter).

The Empire Strikes Back

Are you really surprised that the myth, the legend, Mark Hamill responded to a fan with the most deadpan “dad” answer ever? Because we definitely are not. His character in Star Wars might not be a dad, but Hamill certainly is (he has three kids).

The Empire Strikes Back

Although Luke isn’t much of a jokester, Hamill’s most famous voice-acting character is the Joker — and it definitely looks like Hamill has learned a thing or two from his on-screen personas.

Subtext

Any husband to a woman should know by that point that if you ever try to “explain” something to her, she can and will find a way to throw it back at you. Trust us, no matter how clever you think you are, your wife is smarter than you.

Subtext

So, we know this tweet is meant as just a joke, but we can absolutely bet that this exact scenario has happened in hundreds of homes around the world.

Hit and a Miss

Ah, fresh air, green grass, open skies, and a chill breeze — what’s not to like about having a quick and easy game of frisbee at your family picnic? Until, of course, your super competitive and aggressive family member joins the game.

Hit and a Miss

Once they do, there’s nothing else you can do but run for your life and hope that you somehow manage to not make a complete fool of yourself as they throw that frisbee like the ancient weapon it once was.

Counts for Something

Here’s a fun bookish fact — Bram Stoker, who wrote the original Dracula, never set foot in his famous count’s home of Transylvania. He relied solely on books and atlases to describe the faraway land. Can you imagine doing that without Google Maps?

Counts for Something

Of course, Dracula is hardly the only famous count out there. For this joke, we think we might need to acquire the services of a more fuzzy-fanged character — the Count from Sesame Street, of course.

Fanta-stic!

You know that prank kids would do when a friend would fall asleep early at a slumber party (where they put his hand in water, and you probably know the rest)? Well, we can’t help but wonder if this is what happened here.

Fanta-stic!

Sure, we know it’s just for the sake of the joke, but can you imagine a dream like the one described here? We’re honestly horrified. Great, this joke just unlocked a new nightmare we had no idea we had. Thanks a lot.

Nok it Out

Who says a joke needs an abundance of words to tickle our funny bone? Sometimes, simple is better. In this case, all that’s needed is a couple of words and two pics. As they say, a picture’s worth a thousand words.

Nok it Out

For such a terrible joke (as all dad jokes should be), it’s incredibly effective with minimal effort — we’re pretty impressed. Can you just imagine your dad sending this to you as he lounges in his la-z-boy?

Technical Difficulties

Just as a precaution… kids, don’t try this at home! Seriously, we mean it — don’t touch that socket until you’ve studied as many years as a certified electrician. Otherwise, we’re sure you’ll find yourself recreating this joke in real life.

Technical Difficulties

Shockingly, we find this joke to be a safety hazard from how much it makes us groan. Can you get electrocuted from someone else’s terrible zinger? We just need to know, for, you know, research purposes.

Mathematical

A good dad joke works both on and off the page (or the phone screen, as the case may be). That means that it’s not enough for a punny gag to be funny in writing, it also has to sound just as hilarious (or cringy) out loud.

Mathematical

Sadly, this one only cuts it when written out. Sure, it was a long shot in the first place, as it’s mathematically improbable that a math joke would be funny — but then its value goes down to zero when you try to tell it to someone

Ain’t No Mountain High Enough

“Climb every mountain,” Maria sings in the Sound of Music. She continues, “Search high and low, Follow every highway, Every path you know,” which has us thinking, what exactly is she looking for us all those hills?

Ain’t No Mountain High Enough

Could it be that up some far-off peak, there lies the ultimate treasure — the best dad joke ever? Judging by this tweet, sadly, we think not. Oh well, maybe try going down a valley next time?

Money Time

You might like your yard to be leaf-free year round, but did you know for the sake of your garden, you shouldn’t actually throw all those leaves away? Just think about it, do you think anyone walks around the forest, raking away the leaves?

Money Time

So, instead of throwing away all those leaves, leave them be — first, they’ll keep your plants covered and safer during the winter months, and second, they’ll quickly decompose into the ground and make your soil healthier. Bet you didn’t think you’d be getting gardening tips with this dad zinger.

Untroubled

Do you ever get those nights where you know you have to wake up extra early, so you resolve to get to sleep at a reasonable hour? But then, you start stressing that you might not be able to sleep.

Untroubled

So, you start counting exactly how long you have left to rest, and you stress even more over how little time you have. Then, by the time you wake up, you’ve only managed to sleep for like an hour? Yeah, that just sucks.

Feeling Grounded

Do you think that the very first primitive humans who just discovered how to create tools and how very useful they could be, ever imagined that, one day, their great invention would be used as a cheap joke?

Feeling Grounded

If they’re actually anything like us… we’re sure a few Neanderthal dads would have had a good laugh from this truly silly one-liner. At least now (thanks to the great shovel), we can put this joke where it belongs — six feet under.

It’s a Sign

We guess this guy’s dad really had a dead-end job. Geddit? ‘Cause he put up signs in streets — like dead-end signs? Okay, well, making dad jokes on the fly is harder than it looks!

It’s a Sign

Try it, and you’ll see. After all, there’s no road map to the perfect dad joke out there. If there was, though, we bet this dad stole it, along with all the signs! Yeah, that was terrible, too. Fine, we give up.

A Daily Reminder

Here’s something you don’t actually see all that much in dad jokes — self-deprecating humor — which, as we all know, is the superior form of humor when it comes to making people give you attention, whether it’s with a laugh or a sympathetic look.

A Daily Reminder

But, you know what would make this the ultimate way for a dad to joke with his kids? All you would need to do is change one little word. Instead of “me,” just say “you” or the name of your angsty teenager!

Making You Stew

This is for any boomer dad out there who’s reading this — for the love of all that’s funny, change your password from “Password123.” We promise you, that’s the very first thing that any semi-competent hacker will try.

Making You Stew

No, don’t change it to “12345678” because hat’s next on the hacker’s list. Honestly, using “stroganoff” as your password will probably actually keep you safe. At the very least, you’ll get a laugh anytime you type it in.

Pardon Our French

Parlez-vous français? If your answer is “heh?” we really hope you still get this joke because we think it’s freaking hilarious (pardon our French). We can totally see our dad make this silly gag whenever we make a dumb joke at his expense.

Pardon Our French

So, @DocAtCDI, you might have made us laugh, but you also probably got us in a bit of trouble with our own father. We just hope you’re a father yourself — otherwise, this joke might become a weird paradox that we just can’t handle.

A Daily Reminder

One of the hallmarks of a good joke (and not the cheesy Christmas movie kind of hallmark) is that it can keep working throughout your life. That probably makes this one by Oli only Semi-great.

A Daily Reminder

That’s because it can only be used once a year to full effect. Luckily, when the festive season comes upon us, he can get it out of the attic… along with all those lovely Christmas decorations.

A Second Opinion

Did you hear this joke before? Probably not if you find this terrible joke weirdly relatable. Thankfully, it’s not unheard of to seek a second opinion when it comes to medical advice.

A Second Opinion

This is deaf-inetly one of the cringiest jokes on this list, but we still think the maker of it deserves to hear a little laugh from his audience (even if it’s forced).

Sweater Weather

In the timeless voice of John Travolta in Grease, “It’s electrifying!” This sweater is definitely the “one that [we] want.” If you didn’t just start singing the song in your head, what are you even doing here, youngster?

Sweater Weather

By the way, totally unpopular opinion, but it’s the right one, and you know it — Grease 2 was absolutely the superior movie. Nothing beats Michelle Pfeiffer singing from the top of a ladder that she wants a “Coooooooool Rider!”

What’s in a Name

Some people place great importance on the name they give their kid — as if that one little word is going to affect their child and the whole family for their entire life (which, of course, it totally does).

What’s in a Name

Others are a bit more cavalier about their choice… We’re honestly not sure where we’d place Tawdry’s friends, though. Is it genius, or is it horrible? Just wait until that kid is asked where his name is from, and then we’ll see.

Hi Soul Sister

One of the most important parts of being a parent, beyond making hilariously terrible dad jokes, is, you know, actually parenting your kids. That includes teaching your kids that they should be there to help each other, among other things.

Hi Soul Sister

Of course, in this endeavor, as with many others, humor is your friend. This joke, for example, is sure to make both your kids groan in painful shame that their dad makes such terrible jokes. But at least your kid has probably stopped crying by now, so everyone’s a winner.

Very Earie

Look, everyone, it’s a dad joke in the wild! That’s right, this tweet isn’t just sharing a terrible joke they thought up. This one was actually spontaneously given out around Kandice.

Very Earie

This just proves that a truly good joke is all about timing. This surgeon found the perfect opportunity to use his dadish humor. We wonder how long he’s been holding on to this funny line.

Bromantic

We’re not gonna lie — this joke actually had us laughing or giggling at least five times. Is it absolutely horrible and groan-worthy? Yes, of course it is (otherwise, it wouldn’t be on this list).

Bromantic

Is it also peak bro humor? We certainly think so. Will we be thinking about this joke long after we’ve finished this list? Absolutely! We can’t wait to share it with all our bro friends (can you tell we don’t actually have that many?).

Vroooooom

As every kid knows, an important part of playing with toys is making all those fun action noises, just like in a comic book! And what are dads but overgrown children? So, is it any surprise that one would make this joke?

Vroooooom

Plus, in true clever adult fashion, it mixes its humor with an incredibly popular meme template. Sure, it’s not exactly the most traditional dad joke out there, but we still think it’s terribly funny (and seriously adorable!).

Just Deserts

This joke might have been purely told by Steve Harrison to be funny, but it somehow ended up somewhat educational. Yeah, we’re pretty surprised, too — who knew dads had actual useful and informative knowledge to impart?

Just Deserts

So yeah, thanks to their yellowish-brown coats, camels do actually camouflage pretty well in the desert. Considering they’re probably the biggest animal out there in the heat, though, we have no idea why they would need to… We wonder if Steve has another joke that could teach us that.

Horse Play

So, here’s the thing… we know this is meant to be a joke, but have you ever seen the names of real racehorses? Because those are the real joke. Seriously, they’re all thinly-concealed puns and dad jokes.

Horse Play

That kind of makes sense when you consider who exactly is the audience of such races — mainly middle-aged men, right? So, next time you look at Phar Lap racing, consider how Mayo the horse wouldn’t look out of place.

Fridge-id

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Peas. Peas who? Peas to meet you! …Did we just Google food knock-knock jokes? Yes, yes, we did — and we’re not ashamed of it one bit. That’s why Google is our best friend.

Fridge-id

But, we do honestly think this dad joke is actually funny (in a “snort out your drink when you hear it the first time and get it” way). You know what’s gonna happen after the first time your dad hears it? He’ll totally keep knocking on the fridge door forever.

International

Ke$ha has long ago become a cash-making machine with her incredible beats and amazing musical heart. So, it’s no surprise that she made it so big internationally. But, what does happen to her name when she’s performing outside the US?

International

Do European musical festivals have to announce that “Ke-pound-ha” is about to take the stage? Honestly, that actually sounds pretty freaking awesome! Maybe @tooskinnymariah is on to something with their horrible dad joke… Now if only concert tickets only cost a pound (or a dollar).

Zero or Hero?

Okay, fine, we concede — this one is actually, truly, terrible. This might be one of the most groan-worthy jokes on this list, but you know what, it still made us chuckle!

Zero or Hero?

But, let’s zero in on the problem here. This joke just doesn’t go the usual zero to 60 that dad jokes should go, even though it’s zero hour. Frankly, it’s a zero-sum game to think of all the reasons this joke gets a zero from us.

Going Down With the Ship

Here’s an interesting philosophical question — why are we (as a global culture) still so freaking obsessed with a ship that sunk in 1912? We have to wonder if it might be our modern version of Icrus, ya know, a warning to us to once again not fly too close to the sky.

Going Down With the Ship

Oh shoot, that was darker than we expected. Anyway, back to our regularly scheduled programming. Ahem… dad jokes are just the best and worst, right? This one sure is terrible and hilarious…

30+ Hilarious Cartoons That Appeal to Our Darker Humor

Instagram // @simonsaidcomics

There are some things that can seem really dark if you look at them from exactly the right angle. These cartoonists managed to tap into the darker side of our humor and make us laugh with a few jokes that might not be lighthearted or suit everyone’s taste, but they definitely make us laugh! And you know what they say — laughter is the best medicine!

He Has His Own Method

When you walk in the door, if you have a dog, you’re often greeted with a wagging tail and jumping paws ready to welcome you home. As a matter of fact, your visitors might get the same.

Mikeorganisciak.com // Mike Organisciak

At some darker moments, you might wonder if a man’s best friend would even treat someone who was visiting against your will the same welcome wagon. Hey, he might, but as this cartoonist points out — it stops you as you walk in, so why might it not stop everyone else?

Getting Realistic

When 50 Shades of Grey came out, it scandalized audiences. It also stood out as maybe not the most accurate representation of how dating works for most of us.

Instagram // @Dagsson

Then again, we can all universally relate to the trouble of trying to find the perfect wall color with your partner that might leave you wondering — like this couple — why exactly they need to make so many shades of gray. Is it to complicate your decor process? Is just “gray” too much to ask for?

Think Before You Speak

There are some things that a lot of kids go through as they grow up. A fear of the dark can easily lead a wild imagination to roam and before long, kids start to imagine monsters in their room.

Mikeorganisciak.com // Mike Organisciak

If there really were monsters, though, what inherently makes them monsters? We haven’t heard any reports of these night-time creatures actually causing them harm. So, when you think about it, it seems a little cruel to start name-calling like this.

All in the Wording

When you wish for something, you have to be specific. Otherwise, it’s not always clear what you want. This team was going to fulfill this kid’s wish to become his favorite superhero.

Mikeorganisciak.com // Mike Organisciak

The only downside is that when you think of how Batman actually evolved from just Bruce Wayne into the vigilante character, there are a few steps that most people aren’t really ready to invite into their life — and for good reason. It seems that they were dedicated to a genuine experience, though!

My Bad!

When you think about nothing living on the sun, you probably just think that, well, that makes a lot of sense. Yet, do we ever consider the lack of entertainment the sun has because of it?

Mikeorganisciak.com // Mike Organisciak

Well, probably not — but it’s something that this cartoon artist, Mike Organisciak, showed us in a pretty humorous manner. After all, we all know what the sun can do with something like a magnifying glass when it’s all the way here on Earth! You know what they say… curiosity killed the cat, although this is less of a self-directed consequence.

We All Grieve Differently

When you lose someone, the grieving process can surprise you. After all, the process often includes a whirlwind of emotion that includes a lot more than just a feeling of sadness or missing someone. Plus, as they say, laughter can be the best medicine.

Instagram // @Dagsson

So, why not look at what you can do now that the person in question won’t be bothered by it anymore. What better way to send a friend off than with a pet peeve? Okay, there might be a few other ways.

Happy Holidays…

The story of Santa Claus is one that has entertained and made magic for children all around the world when it comes to Christmas. It brings to mind a jolly guy with magical helpers and a giving nature.

Instagram // @Daggson

When you really think about it, though, the elves seem to have jobs that they do all year with no break. That might get more than a little exhausting after a while. It makes you wonder what kind of benefits the elves get and how Santa behaves the other 364 days of the year.

Rumors, Rumors, Rumors

It’s interesting to see how people react to the signs they’re given by other people. The simplest thing to do was to ask this person, but sometimes we assume someone is meaner or tougher than they are.

Instagram // @Tonybts2

After all, if we all had to count how many scars we’d gained from our feline friends, it might be hard to even give an accurate ballpark guess as to the number. After all, it can just seem like the price to pay for falling so hard for these ferocious predators that just so happen to be about as cute and snuggly as they can be temperamental.

They Did Warn You

There are some things that a lot of people fear, but the odds of them happening are pretty low. For example, the odds that the average person will find themselves in a shark attack are pretty low.

Mrlovenstein.com // @MrLovenstein

In fact, you might be surprised by the things you’re more likely to be killed by than a shark. As this cartoonist points out, you might have to watch for farm animals more than aquatic creatures. We aren’t so sure that carries over when you’re already in the ocean.

Let’s Get Down to Business

If you were to work in a job where they send you on a lot of business trips, you have the chance to see a lot of new places in the process.

Mikeorganisciak.com // Mike Organisciak

New places also mean the chance to meet new people and form all kinds of new relationships. It seems like these two are about to fill out a business trip cliché, but when it comes to the final panel, we learn that there’s only literal business happening here. She looks so happy about it, too.

Oh, Bless You

There are some things that you say out of habit and because they’ve come to be considered polite. For instance, a lot of people say “bless you” when they hear someone sneeze.

Toonhole.com // Chris Allison

The world won’t end if you don’t say it, and while some people might not like that phrase in particular, it’s not the worst thing you can say. Then again, we guess if legends are to be believed, blessing a few creatures might be really, really detrimental for them.

It’s Just a Prank!

Okay, let’s be honest — there are some pranks that go beyond the idea of a prank and into the unethical or downright criminal. Luckily, no one really gets hurt in a cartoon. If you see smoke coming under the door, it’s best not to panic and consider fire safety.

Mikeorganisciak.com // Mike Organisciak

In that case, though, he probably should have done the first step you’re supposed to do and touch the door to see if it’s too hot to get out through the door. This one is going to be hard to explain to HR.

Finally Meeting Up

There’s a group out there for everything, especially as social media becomes such an integral part of everyday life. When it comes to making friends, it can be a really useful tool!

Toonhole.com // Chris Allison

Of course, if you meet online, you have to actually make the jump to seeing each other in person, right? Well, if you bond on a common interest, it should be easy. After all, you already have something to talk about. Then again, that idea might not work in these two guys’ cases.

Secret Thoughts

Have you ever thought about what it might be like to read minds? What if you could just pop a hat on and suddenly, you can know if your crush is thinking about you? It’d be tempting.

Reddit // u/mrlovens

Then again, we can’t help but feel like this cartoonist has a point and that we’d quickly hear something that we didn’t want to. After all, take a second to think about your private thoughts and what you think your crush would say if they could hear them.

Gotta Have Boundaries

They say that just because you can doesn’t always mean you should. What are we talking about? Well, just about anything!

Instagram // @Toonholechris

If you offer to teach someone something and they decline, you aren’t obligated to maintain the offer if their plans change and they decide that they have time. Of course, you may not want to or have the ability to show off your flexibility like this and decline with such frightening flair.

A Little Fun in the Afterlife

No matter what age you are, life can’t be all business. To be happy, you have to find time and ways to laugh and feel joy. Who says your mischievous nature can’t extend into the afterlife?

Mikeorganisciak.com // Mike Organisciak

If you believe in ghosts, it seems like they have a penchant for mischief in the first place. Of course, there are no promises you won’t annoy the other ghosts around you. If you were to continue past life, it makes sense that consequences would, too.

Good News and Bad News

It’s hard to deliver bad news. In some professions, the bad news is worse than others. Bad news from doctors isn’t the same as the bad news you might hear from your florist.

Toonhole.com // Mike Nassar

This doctor was geared up to give these parents the worst news possible — the kind of news that you might want to double-check the chart before delivering. However, it’s hard to be distracted by that when you’re imagining how that office must smell if he’s just keeping him in the desk.

All in the Delivery

When it comes to language, we use a lot more cues in a conversation than just the words someone says. Their pauses, inflection, tone, and body language can be very telling as well.

Toonhole.com // Chris Allison

As for this guy, he might have benefited from pausing a little later in his sentence — or at least by not saying this with such a big smile on his face. While getting laid off isn’t great, we do have to say we’re not sure how they were planning to keep that initial promise anyway.

Hard to Catch a Break

At work, it can feel surprisingly exhausting to sit in front of a computer all day. After all, human eyes weren’t really designed to handle the technology we’d make millennia down the road.

Toonhole.com // @ToonholeChris

However, there’s a lot more to consider here than just wondering if you should get away from your work computer. If you want to rest your eyes, it’s time to set the computer games and Netflix shows aside. Oh, and you might want to avoid packed cities where there are computers in every inch of your visual space.

A New, Cruel Method

Pirates weren’t and aren’t exactly known for their kindness, forgiveness, and welcoming nature. Any pirate movie will show you some of the more dramatic sides to life on the seven seas.

Twitter // @ToonholeRyan

For instance, you’ve probably seen your fair share of movies where someone is ordered to walk the plank. Not every pirate used the same method, though. If you’ve ever eaten Cap’n Crunch cereal, you know that this is the sort of torture the cartoon character would call for.

We’re Going Someone

You always want to keep hope for the future alive. What else will keep you going if you don’t believe that tomorrow could be just as good, if not better, than today?

Twitter // @ToonHoleChris

On the other hand, that’s unfortunately just not how life works for every living thing. It’s an especially bleak outlook if you’re born into the world as a prey animal. These fish may have had a lot of hope, but we think the only place they’re going is the dinner table.

Now, Why Would You Say That?

As we said earlier, there are some times that you just need to get away from modern technology to give yourself a chance to get refreshed.

Imgflip // @Li_Ingemundsen

Going on a camping trip or hike with a friend can be a great way to take away all the temptation of technology. That can feel really peaceful and freeing. Then again, if our companion said something like this, we might be rethinking exactly how relaxed we should be.

What Are You Doing in There?

Taking a shower isn’t just a chance to rinse off and get clean. It can also be a chance to gather your thoughts and take a moment to relax while you stand under the running water.

Instagram // @ ToonholeChris

As for this person, they couldn’t stay away from something that we definitely all do in the shower. If you can’t win arguments in the shower, where are you going to get that validation? Plus, it can really help blow off steam when someone really irks you.

Be Careful Who You Trust

When you work at a company, it’s not uncommon that you might have to attend a few team-building exercises. There’s nothing that these events love more than a good trust fall.

Toonhole.com // Chris Allison

It goes against your instincts to let yourself freely fall, but the point is to trust the people who are there to catch you. Have you ever heard the phrase, “Be careful who you trust?” That’s wise advice for something like a trust fall unless you want something like this to happen.

Getting Desperate

Sometimes, you just start to feel like love is out of your reach. After a bunch of failed dates or even failed relationships, it can seem like meeting the one is going to take extreme measures.

Instagram // @simonsaidcomics

This guy was so done with dating that he was willing to call off human women altogether and take his chance with someone on the other side of the spiritual fold. We don’t remember the rhyme going quite like this when we were young, but we wish the new couple luck.

Just Playing Around

Tornadoes aren’t anything to ignore. These natural weather patterns can wreak havoc with high winds as well as cause damage thanks to the flying debris it starts to gather.

Toonhole.com // @ToonholeChris

Still, this comic seems to start out lighthearted enough. In fact, we’re a little endeared to these two friends as they play a game of tag. Then again, we guess that game would have consequences for anyone who just so happened to be in the way.

A Magician to Save Us All

Most people don’t think of the magician sitting in the back of the room making sure he’s got all his doves hidden away as someone who could potentially save the world.

Instagram // @simonsaidcomics

Then again, where does the line really sit when you’re considering a modern magician versus the concept of the wizards of fantasy that wield powerful magic to stop their foes? Of course, as this cartoon shows, they may have to take a slightly different approach from Gandalf.

You Were Warned

There’s nothing quite as frustrating as trying to get home only to find yourself lost. Nothing tells you that you’ve gone the wrong direction than running into a dead end.

Toonhole.com // Chris Allison

Of course, a dead end usually means that there’s no more road to follow. In other words, the road has effectively “died.” The couple in this comic had a lot more to contend with than just trying to figure out the map.

A Modern Princess

If you don’t know the story of Rapunzel, it’s about a long-haired princess who is locked away in an impossibly tall tower. That is until her prince comes to climb her equally as impossibly long hair.

Instagram // @simonsaidcomics

In the modern era, Rapunzel might not have to wait around. Plus, who says she has to stop at just pulling her prince up? If her hair is strong enough for a person to climb, there’s no way it’s not strong enough to use as a pulley to get some delivery up to that window.

It’s Not Easy!

There are a few things in life that seem like they never get easier, no matter how many times you try them. Flirting is one of those things that can be clunky and awkward.

Twitter // @ToonholeRyan

You might even wish there was an easier way to stay on track. A teleprompter might help. Hey, this guy even saw far enough ahead that he had a response ready and loaded onto the teleprompter. If only this woman hadn’t noticed the weird machinery following her around…

Let it Out, Buddy

Every human being has their own emotions to deal with. No matter how big and tough you are, you’re bound to feel sad sometimes.

Reddit // u/toonholeryan

This coach was telling this guy to do exactly what he needed and he did. It might not win him the round, but it looks like it could be kind of cathartic. He definitely looks like he’s going through a lot with this divorce, too.

Setting the Record Straight

If you’ve ever read The Ugly Duckling, you know that the story follows, well, a rather ugly baby duck who ends up being a swan.

Facebook // ToonholeRyan

It seems like this duckling was still holding out hope for his own story. There was one thing that this swan was going to set straight, though — this wasn’t her ugly baby, and this wasn’t her problem. Wow, that would sting if you were the duck in question here.

Gotta Have a Backup Plan

You hear the phrase “live fast, die young” more often than you might think. What if you don’t accomplish the whole phrase in your life?

Toonhole.com // @ToonholeJohn

What if you live fast without any plan but manage to live into your old age? What’s the plan, then? Don’t worry — that’s not something this guy neglected to think about. Of course, there was a plan if he was going to live long, just not a good one.

This Isn’t Good

There are some pieces of technology that it seems like society collectively can’t wait for. Who hasn’t dreamed about what they’d do if they had access to a time machine?

Instagram // @berkelymews

Before you go jumping back in time, though, think about everything that your machine will need to run. After all, we’re not sure that the dinosaurs have any electrical outlets installed for these two to use. We sure hope they like the era they traveled to!

Are We Ready for This?

A lot of people — whether it’s in jest or passing or deadly serious — have thought about what they’d do if they suddenly found themselves in the middle of an apocalypse they were trying to survive. In reality, our actions don’t always live up to our own expectations.

Instagram // @ToonholeJohn

After all, if you’re a yoga teacher or business consultant without the help of a single architect or engineer, you’re going to have a hard time rebuilding, even if you’re really well-meaning about the whole thing.

We All Have Dreams

We all have dreams for ourselves and sometimes find ourselves wishing for something more. Maybe you make necessary wishes to meet your basic needs, or perhaps you prefer to dream of your days to come as a star.

Facebook // Toonholeryan

If you’re the person behind all of the cartoons like the ones we’ve looked at here, you might wish that coming up with twist endings was a little easier. We wonder if making this comic about writer’s block helped this artist’s writer’s block.

Twist Ending

A lot of these comics are based around the concept of a twist ending. This one might take the cake for surprising us with the final panel. Being dubbed a genius seems like a pretty high compliment, right?

Toonhole.com // @ToonholeJohn

How can someone use that against you? Well, if you’ve ever seen a cartoon from the ’90s or ’80s, you might just see this line coming. It didn’t take long for this host to show their true colors, either!

Nothing Like the Pictures

As the world has become more enmeshed when it comes to daily life and technology, a lot more of your personal life might happen on your phone or at least start there. That’s the concept behind dating apps.

Instagram // @berkeleymews

After all, it’s hard to meet new people, so why not let technology help you along? Unfortunately, not everyone on Tinder is as honest as you might be when looking for love. We also don’t often think of these characters on the app.

Adjusting Expectations

When an emergency strikes, you would hope there’s a hero nearby to help out. Of course, a Transformer-like character would be a bit limited in how their shape-shifting helps.

Twitter // @benzaehringer

This character was at least ready to help as much as they could. What could you want more when someone’s hurt than an ambulance? Then again, an ambulance can’t help someone who’s already too far gone. That won’t stop this hero from thinking practically!

Together Forever

The story behind Toy Story is really quite touching. What kid wouldn’t want their toys to value them as much as they value their toys when they’re young?

Tapas // Berkley Mews

Some people even keep their toys well into adulthood because they symbolize such fond memories for them. What if Andy hadn’t given his toys away? What if he really wanted to stay with his childhood best friends forever? Maybe there are some downsides to keeping your sentience a secret.

Old Habits Die Hard

If you were to visit 123 Sesame Street, you might wonder why this childhood town has a character who doesn’t have a home aside from a trash can on the street.

Instagram // @berkeleymews

This artist imagined what it might be like if Oscar the Grouch’s friends chipped in to make sure he had a bigger, better shelter to keep him safe from the elements. We guess it’s to be expected that he might have a difficult transition into living in a whole house.

This Doesn’t Seem Fair

If you were alive when Harry Potter started coming out, odds are you might have spent your 10th birthday with your fingers crossed, hoping an owl might appear with your long-awaited invitation.

Reddit // u/LilliputianMouse

On the other hand, we guess a school big enough to take up a whole castle would need staff as well as students and everyone’s favorite (and least favorite) professors. Plus, with that many battles, you’re going to need a custodian. That does lead to a rather awkward broom gifting, though.

He Just Wanted to Join

If you’ve ever used an online AI when it comes out and then come back a few months later, it’ll be clear how much “learning” the program did in your absence.

Instagram // @berkeleymews

So, we can see why these kids might not think much of it when an android would cue up a prompt to ask what was happening in their immediate surroundings. Then again, with a scenario like this, you might really hope that your robot is waterproof to avoid a tragedy like this.

Now That’s a Trick

Earlier, we talked about how magicians might be our secret weapon if we find ourselves facing a dragon anytime soon. Some of them are really dedicated. This is about as dedicated as you can get to a bit.

Instagram // @berkeleymews

Not many people would take their magic trick with them all the way to the grave. We also have to wonder how he managed to time his death just right and what his lawyer had to say when he requested this odd change in the will.

The Eternal Mystery

There are some questions you might have that you end up heading straight to your parents. At the end of the day, kids do usually think that their parents know more than most. There are some questions that are hard for even parents to answer, though.

Instagram // @berkeleymews

For instance, tying a tie might be something you’ve seen the results of on your father but who knew that he was pulling tutorials up for every formal event? Maybe the real secret here is to do what you have to do to get the job done.